I was just wondering... (06.08.10 11:17 am)

I usually have the same type of dream. At least twice every week. It's a dream that is basically very close to being my worst nightmare. In this dream, my actions are completely NOT anything I would ever really do, consider doing, or even want to do in real life (don't let your thoughts run away with you, I'm just talking about a conversation replayed). I absolutely despise having this dream, it makes me feel weak and depressed, because I know I'm a different person than I used to be, I've grown, but yet this dream makes me feel like all that I've learned, I'm completely ignoring and not applying.

So, when things seem to be the “same old problem” or “the same old disappointing outcome” in a situation, my natural tendency is to get MAD, you know? Just irritated. I don't understand why we don't just, you know, change it. Is out out of our control, or are we just being lazy? When I feel like I'm doing everything I can to work out a situation or move forward, but I just keep landing in the same place, over and over; Does this mean maybe I'm pursuing the wrong outcome? Or not trying hard enough?

I pray. When you pray do you just ask God to help you get to where you want to in a situation or life? Or do you ask Him to show you if there is somewhere different you need to be going? It's not a trick question, I'm just asking-wondering what our natural tendencies are as humans, and also, what the Spirit of God guides us to. Confusing I know. I feel like all this just means – back to the drawing board.... LOL.

I read a post today by a management team we are considering working with (as I'm diligently doing my research) that said “If life is, indeed, a journey then the secret of life is to learn to fall in love with that. It’s not about arriving at your destination or reaching your goals that matters. It’s the struggle, the pain, the bloody noses and skinned knees that provide us with the real joy in our life. Believe me, realizing your biggest dreams will seem somewhat empty when you finally accomplish them. When you survey your life you will realize that the real juice of life came from the journey and not from what you accomplished.”

I'd love to your know your thoughts - email me or write me on facebook :) Links above...

P.S.
Background noise right now...
“Silently going under” re-recorded as a tribute to Wes King by Caitlin Evanson (violin player for Taylor Swift) popped up on my itunes from the record we did together with a few other artists. It's really good BTW, check it out.

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